family

So I'm so fortunate that I get along with and love all my family! And they all love me. I know people, even close to me that their family just doesn't communicate or spend time with each other. We sometimes struggle to please everyone or accommodate everyone. Especially during the holidays. It's always a battle- who's house are we going to and who is invited. With parents whom are divorced and also those with kids that their fathers are separate it makes for a tricky holiday plan. But in the end we all love each other to the most of our ability.

We moved here from New York instead of New Jersey on purpose. Because my family all lives here in Connecticut. We are frequently going up to their place to visit whether for just because or an event/party. Not often do they visit us. usually if it's just a bbq or a party of some sort. So.. for my sister and the boys to come yesterday meant a lot to me. We decorated my house for Christmas with the boys. As far as I can tell they had a blast! And my Christmas tree never looked any better. But to have family here to share such a special time of year meant the world to me.

Even though holiday's are tricky we always manage to have a good time and most of us be together at the same event.

art making

Good morning all.. today's blog is about my art making. I have been beating myself up for years that I don't do art daily. I consider myself an artist.. maybe not a good artist but and artist none the less. I started with oil painting. When my ex uncle died I inherited all his art supplies. He had tons of oil paints, brushes and paraphernalia for painting. I was so excited. I never painted before. So my ex's mother bought me a adult ed painting class. So I started my career in painting. I wasn't very good but with patience and perseverance I was able to create the most beautiful portrait of a fairy sitting in a field of flowers and butterflies. From there I did a bunch more. Then certain set backs happened in my life and I strayed from painting. But I did decide to go to college to get a Master's in Art Therapy. Because of this I had to take several art classes just to get accepted in the program. I was horrible at drawing and painting and mostly pottery.

So for years I did no art work. Then I discovered art journaling. instead of just writing down your thoughts you incorporate pictures, decorations and fodder. Fodder (random scraps and items to create with) . Mixed media was foreign to me. You use painting, drawing, stickers, tape, glue, stamping, etc all together on one art piece instead of just oil painting for example.

It was my desire to do art journaling and/ or mixed media every day. This is where art therapy comes in. The therapeutic qualities of art making are great for your thoughts, positivity and mood. So if I did that every day I'd be a happy lady right?!!

So I made my basement into an art studio. It was a place to work out but we sold the treadmill. So it was just beckoning me to come down there. The benefits are I can spread all my supplies out all over the place. I have to use the space heater because its very cold down there. It's soo worth it.

So I have used it every day since putting it there. except Thanksgiving day. and Ruben came down yesterday and said.. what are you doing down here that you are here all the time now. So I showed him a few things and he was impressed. And actually so am I! this is one of my goals to do art on the daily ... fingers crossed it stays that way!

spoiled

So there are a few people in my life that are so spoiled. I'm not naming names that's for sure. Although I don't know They were raised this way and now that they're older they are set in their ways. I'll admit I love purses that are designer and prefer their signature prints just to show of that its Coach or whatever brand. Other than that I really don't care about labels.

So I have to give these people a gift for the baby shower. They are expecting gifts in the hundreds. one person I know may give them a gift valued at 600 dollars. Which I talked them out of I hope. I want to get a diaper bag but a fancy one. The Coach diaper bag is too much money. And just think.. you are putting poopy diapers in a bag that cost hundreds??? so what on earth am I going to give them??

I have never met some of these people but I'm very nervous to. I have to look my very best for sure! I'm obsessing over this. If I'm going to meet these people for the first time I wanna look thinner and prettier. I have a little over 1 month to do so. So we shall see. I know I know I should be satisfied with the way I look now but I'm not.

So I guess I will just try until the baby shower to lose weight and buy the perfect outfit!

thanksgiving thanks

Happy Thanksgiving ! Today is a day to give thanks. I have a huge amount to be thankful for. Should I list it?? Of course my family and friends. I have made family with a large group of people and I really love every single one of them. I also have every blessed material object a girl could ask for. And for that I am not only thankful but I feel spoiled for it.
 God is so wonderful ya know?! He gives us all we need and then some. If only we listen to him and serve him.
I could use my time and volunteer at a shelter but eh.. I don't know.
I guess the best is to keep giving thanks to God and stay humble.

a long break

So if you had been following my blogs you would know that I went off the map. It all started because the new medicine I was taking made me even more groggy than the other meds. Which I didn't imagine was even possible as I was struggling to wake up with the old meds. Lately, knock on wood, I've been getting up super early like today for example, 8 am! Last Sunday it was 7:30am! My husband was shocked. The medicine has been a Godsend. It has totally done a 360 on my life. I never knew what happy was and how depressed I was until I got on it. Really! No wonder I laid in bed for hours not wanting to get out--- I was depressed.. duh, why didn't I think of that??!!
So know that I'm no longer depressed I'm such a changed woman. I am super talkative and friendly with friend, family or strangers! I only have about a tenth of the worries I use to have. I'm still not drinking and don't desire to most of the time. This is ground breaking for me.

I want to discuss selfishness and humility for a moment.

So over the weekend I went Christmas and birthday shopping at the mall and also online shopping. I got everyone done except 2. I had 12 gifts and 12 stocking stuffers as well as 6 birthdays! But here's the thing-- no matter what store I went into I found something or somethings I would want for myself. I had to use serious self-discipline to deter myself from buying for me not another. This leads me to the topic of selfishness... I get so bothered when I think of how much I have and how I don't need anything. In fact I Should probably donate a lot. For example: I have been tracking what I wear. I haven't repeated an outfit since September. No grated I bought all my clothes a thrift shop that puts things into perspective. But still, I feel overwhelmed. I have an iPad, designer sunglasses, a HUGE collection of purses, you name it I probably have it. So why when shopping for holidays did I want almost 1 thing in every store I went into?! Am I greedy, or is this normal? My trainer was like well it's your money you earned it if you wanna spend on yourself why. Well he would be right if I didn't drop over 150 on a wallet a few weeks ago. Shopping is like a drug for me, it feels so good that I can't resist buying stuff.

But on another hand I am very humble. I volunteer my time and services. I donate clothes that I don't wear or fit in. I need to just not beat myself up and be thankful to God for all that I have and all he has given me.