commitment part 2

So I've done it, I became a member of a gym, again! I am on day 2 and I was having trouble getting out of bed. First to do my blogging at Starbucks and after that go to the gym. But I did it; I got free. This is for me, for my benefit. Being lazy will get me nowhere. Except to feel down and negative about myself.

Anyone else have trouble committing to things?

I heard it takes 21 days to formulate a habit. So I have 18 to go!

I beat myself up a LOT! I have all the time in the world and don't take advantage of that.  Tv is not helpful or important. I use to watch Sex and the City all afternoon. over and over again! as they ran marathons on E!  Now that I don't have cable I have nothing to watch. well , nothing too good.

I can commit to a man really easy. I make a pretty damn good girlfriend/wife... but as far as daily routine items I suck at it. Here's what I want to commit to:

face care routine (cleanse, tone, moisturize)
exercise
art making
rosetta stone

none of these are difficult really maybe the exercise one will be the hardest for me.
 Let me know down below if you have something you'd like to commit to but are having trouble with it.

Today's drink: Café LAtte

value the moments that make memories

As I'm driving to go meet with my Grandfather today, someone whom I take care of daily as his aide, I get a phone call from my mother. She is crying and states, He passed. I freak out. What are you serious, how do you know?? she quickly realizes that I forgot her great friend was in the hospital and in a coma and that she was talking about him. I thought she was referring to my grandfather. Although I was sad by his death, it was a relief that my grandfather was alive.
This man was a great dear friend to my mother. She valued his friendship far more than anyone I have known her be friend's with. She talked so kindly of him; a lot better than that of her ex-husband, my father. He was very, very ill since she's known him. He is definitely at peace now and this has been a blessing for him.

When I arrived at my grandfather's I felt myself embracing him in a hug far more passionately then I might have the day before and the day before that. I had patience for his repeat of the same questions and I was proud of him for getting ready for going out on dial-a-ride to have lunch at the senior center.

To get him to learn his bus driver's name I have associated it with a song- Michelle My Belle. Since my grandfather aka Pepere is french, he knows this song well. We sang it together several times today. Although not only does he know all the words, he pronounces all the french so perfectly. I'll never forget this memory of us walking down his driveway after leaving the bus and him saying "what a nice driver, what's her name again?". Me- "Michelle, my belle". and Pepere- starts singing the complete song twice!!

I stayed with him far longer than I normally would. I tell him I will leave and he asks me to stay. I can't resist. I have no other obligation.

When I get home I am approached by my 6 mo old kitten, Twixie and her cute little face delights me. (she's intently staring at the computer screen right now as the words appear.)

I immediately go into my art space and make a mandala in memory of Richard.

My goal of quitting smoking has been on track and today marks one full week without a smoke. I started a new habit today. I plan to get addicted to drinking water. hahahaha.sounds healthier, right?!